What to Do When Life’s Making You Disappointed

Amy Taylor October 22, 2013

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No matter how great your life is, you still are prone to disappointment. All of us are. It is a natural emotion that occurs when we don’t get what we want, what we expect, or what we hope for. Some disappointments are too small to create lasting effect, such as the restaurant’s “best seller” not really tasting good. But some disappointments are big enough to impact our quality of life, like the end of a long-term relationship or job loss.

How do you respond with disappointment? Do you pout? Do you walk away? Do you get angry? Or do you deny it?  Many people find it hard to manage disappointments in life, which leads to bigger problems. If you have troubles coping with disappointments or frustrations that you encounter, the following tips are for you.

Set realistic expectations. Expectations play a big role in your likelihood to be disappointed later in life. Whatever goal it is – whether weight loss, a career change, or a job promotion – you always want to set realistic expectations. You really don’t expect losing 1 stone in one week! No matter how hard you exercise or restrict your diet, it’s almost close to impossible. Consider asking others (your closed friends or family) if your expectations are out of line. They may have a different or better perspective.

Learn to manage your emotions. When you are good at managing emotions, you can effectively deal with just about any negative experiences, including disappointments. You might be tempted to deny or ignore feelings of disappointment, but it isn’t the right thing to do. It may hurt at first but focusing on your emotions is really the best way to eliminate them. Assess what you are feeling at the moment. What specifically is the reason for your disappointment? Is it the fact that you were not hired or is it the feeling of not being ‘good enough’? When you fully understand the real sources of your disappointment, you can formulate better solutions to address them.

Don’t take it personally. It’s easy to be flown away with disappointments and think that they happen because you deserve them. If you think this way, you may be hindering yourself from acquiring wisdom from the failures and negative experiences you encounter. They may look like the thorns in the roses or the stumbling blocks on the road but often, disappointments can help you discover more about yourself, improve your ways and become a better person.

Don’t be afraid to feel disappointed. Experiencing more disappointments can increase your tolerance. Don’t let disappointments in life turn you into a pessimistic person. Well, they probably are events that you may lack control of, but there are more things in your life that you are very much in control of. When you focus more of your energy on them, you will feel better.

It’s true – disappointment is part of life. But it is an essential part – something we need to grow and succeed.