Ways to Feel Better About the Way You Look

Rebecca Lewis July 30, 2014

It’s true – a person’s inner qualities are more important than his or her looks. But in this world where people heavily emphasises physical appearance, we can’t help but feel frustrated when we don’t seem to like what we see in the mirror.

There’s no wonder why beauty and fashion are among the largest industries today. Some people go to great lengths to look good. They don’t care about spending thousands if not millions, on products and treatments that will enhance their looks. Meanwhile, other people depend on their appearance to feel good, as if it is their source of self-esteem. Ageing presents a particular challenge for women because media depicts that as years pass by, beauty fades away. And those whose self-esteem depends largely on how they feel about their looks are most vulnerable to the issue of ageing. Just recently, researchers from the Oakland University in Michigan found that women, who are very conscious of their body’s appearance, including its culturally-defined defects, will be most likely to suffer the ill effects on their self-esteem of defining themselves in terms of their appearance.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting to look better. But as we work our way towards improving ourselves, we should also learn to accept and appreciate ourselves. Here are some ways to feel better about the way you look, even if you don’t seem to completely like what you see in the mirror:

Forget about the media’s definition of beauty. The mass media has a heavy influence on the way we look at beauty. The ‘beauty’ they instilled in our minds means being paper-thin and tall whilst wearing signature clothes. It’s true that you cannot change society’s definition of beauty, but you can definitely change your own. Don’t focus on the beauty you see on billboards you pass by, or magazines you read. Instead, focus on the beauty that you see from real people you know, especially those you admire the most.

Make your self-esteem contingent on your inner qualities. Your physical appearance can really affect your confidence level, but not entirely. Instead of pointing out your physical flaws – why you aren’t skinny as those TV models, or why you don’t have a nice skin complexion – focus on the inner qualities that give you strength, such as your positive traits, abilities, talents and skills. Physical beauty fades, but the inner qualities you’ve developed will stay there for years. And they will define who you are.

Wear what makes you comfortable. You need not dress like Lady Gaga to look fashionable. You can wear a simple pair of jeans and sweatshirt and still look gorgeous – as long as you are comfortable with it. Later on, you might find that, you will feel less fixated about being like those you see on TV and be truer to yourself.

Lose weight to be healthy. Many people want to lose weight for only one purpose: to look great. But if that is your motivation, you could be setting yourself up for failure. You might be even tempted to use weight loss methods that can be detrimental to your health, such as crash diets. The sad thing is, despite your efforts, there is no sustainability on these methods and once you stop them, you go back to your old body. But if your motivation to lose weight is to become healthier, you take a holistic and more sensible approach, which includes regular exercise and proper diet. Later on, these routines become part of your lifestyle. You don’t just lose weight, but keep it that way for long.

Smile. You will be surprised of how smiling can make you look much more beautiful, even without makeup on. Not only that, wearing a smile makes you more attractive to others, more likeable, and therefore – more likely to win friends and perhaps – a new date?

Stop comparing yourself to others. If browsing on Facebook is already making you feel uncomfortable, log it out. Constantly comparing yourself to others is not going to make you look and feel good; neither will it improve your self-esteem.

Be your own best friend. You won’t do something that would hurt the feelings of your best friend right? So be kind to yourself. Appreciate your body, instead of hating it. Love your imperfections, instead of condemning them. Just as the popular song goes – “You are amazing, just the way you are”.

Changing your perception about beauty is not an easy task. But by learning how to appreciate yourself, particularly your inner qualities, and redefining you own sense of beauty, you will eventually get to the point wherein you will define it in terms that allow you to obtain self-fulfilment.