The Social Challenges that Intelligent Children Face

Amy Taylor March 18, 2013

Many parents whose kids struggle at school usually think it is much easier to raise an intelligent child. But it is not always the case. Having a smart kid can be difficult and challenging for parents. Often, these children are confronted with problems that, when not resolved at the earliest time possible, could lead to greater consequences.

What’s the downside of having a smart child?

Most people think that having high grades in school is a key factor in determining a child’s true potential. However, one’s true potential is not just measured by their achievements and IQ levels, but also by the ability to grow, and learn and adapt to change all throughout his or her lifetime. Eileen Kennedy-Moore, PhD., and Mark Lowenthal, Psy.D, authors of the book “Smart Parenting for Smart Kids”, it takes more than school smarts to create more fulfilling lives. And just like those who struggle with their school performances, intelligent kids also experience challenges inside and outside the school.

Peer Relationships

Social relationship is critical to personality development. But smart kids are more likely to have problems ‘making friends’ than their average peers. And it has many reasons. First, they usually have different interests with other kids. Highly intellectual children may also have troubles getting involved in social situations where they can actually meet and make friends with their schoolmates. There is no exact formula in establishing quality friendships, unlike solving math problems. Drs Kennedy-Moore and Lowenthal advise parents to teach their children to observe and analyse social situations, and act properly. This technique involves three steps – see, think, and do. First, kids need to see what is going on with their peers – this means understanding the situation and observing how their peers are behaving. Second, they need to think before they act – interpreting feelings and predicting responses. Lastly, they have to get used to the first two steps to feel more comfortable socialising with others.

Perfectionism

Smart kids usually have issues with perfectionism, which makes them more prone to disappointment, isolation, even depression. These children are afraid to make mistakes. And when they do, they get very frustrated, a fact that makes them less likely to try again and improve their skills. They get easily distracted by minor mistakes and often see their flaws more than their potential. Praising children for their skills and talents may not be enough to help them deal with issues on perfectionism, as this can make them less likely to continue facing challenges that come their way, according to research. Instead of comforting children with praise, Kennedy-Moore and Lowenthal recommend acknowledging children’s emotion, offering affection, and shifting the reaction in a more positive direction. It can be helpful as well to help them recognise what went right, than letting these children focus on what went wrong.

Emotional Sensitivity

They say high IQ comes with low EQ. Smart kids often have problems dealing with their emotions. They tend to react inappropriately towards situations and events, do tantrums, get mad, and cry even in small mishaps. Furthermore, they get deeply wounded by criticism, a fact that makes them an easy target of bullying. To conquer emotional sensitivity in highly intelligent kids, Kennedy-Moore and Lowenthal advice parents to help their kids understand their emotions, interpret things in a positive perspective, and cope with negative feelings. Sometimes, intervention of a professional child therapist can be very helpful in dealing with this issue.

 

Dear Readers,

Is your smart kid is currently dealing with one or more issues mentioned above? How do you help him or her cope with such problem?

Share your idea’s by posting a comment below.