The Naughty Revelations about Sex

Amy Taylor January 28, 2013

Most of us openly talk about different things on a daily basis, from our planned get-togethers to the stories of the past, the best places to visit, the ugliest pet – anything under the sun. But there are things that as much as we want to discuss with someone or with others, we are most hesitant to. And one of them is sex. Admit it, there are times when you feel like talking about it for hours but you chose to avoid the topic because you know it’s ‘inappropriate’.

While sex is often the best way for couples to express their love and affection, this ‘biological’ process often leaves us with negative feelings not just about ourselves, about our partners, but about sex itself.

You must have some questions about this biological act that you want to be answered. Here are some of the naughtiest revelations about sex and the truth behind them.

Most People are Afraid to Talk about Sex

Sex is a private matter to which details are strictly confined in the bedroom. Even long-time lovers rarely talk about it, as sex usually happens unplanned. But this does not mean that people are disinterested about the matter. In fact, it is one of the most talked about topics in the world. Despite being a private matter, sex has been a focus of the media which secretly manipulates the way the public react and behave about sex matters.

Hearing the word ‘not tonight’ is truly heart-breaking

They say the moment you get married, you could have as many kisses and hugs as you want. But in real life, this rarely happens. Studies suggest that many couples experience a reduction in their sexual interest during married life. When a person you just met in the bar turned you down, that’s no big deal. But if is your spouse who says ‘no’, it can cause your heart to bleed. This just proves that sex is not just an act alone. Sex involves emotions, love and affection, full acceptance and willingness – things we can only get from the ones we love.

Marriage isn’t to blame for less sex

There are plenty of reasons why younger couples are more sexually active than older, married couples. First off, married couples have much more things to attend to than unmarried ones. Keeping the household, paying the bills, raising the children – these things can sap our energy to the point when even though we want to, we would choose not to have sex. Many married couples tend to avoid sex not because they lost the interest, or they think it’s no longer fun. It’s because there are immediate and important demands they need to deal with first. Pleasure comes second.

Even little things hurt.

Often, issues on sex starts with the pettiest things – such as forgetting to turn off the light before bed, cutting the bread the wrong way, or being 2-minute late in a dinner date. While it’s true that misunderstandings and arguments are common among couples, especially those in established relationships, frequent fights, no matter how small they are, can be detrimental to a couple’s sex life. Once the anger sparks, the desire for any sexual activity goes down, no matter how eager partner had been a few minutes ago. Such anger is often intensified by unresolved conflicts, mistakes committed in the past, deceptions, and so on. Sex is the least thing you want to do when you are completely infuriated.

Creativity intensifies sexual desire.

Not in much desire to have sex with your spouse? Sometimes, you may need to spend a little more to arouse your sexual desire. For instance, going to a hotel and renting a room with beautiful curtains and draperies, comfortable bed, and lovely upholstery can actually bring out the ‘beast’ in you. It’s not simply about being luxurious or being creative. When you have sex in a different place, you are actually departing yourselves from the things that remind you of your domestic obligations. The living room with the old chairs and furniture often make you think you should work harder and delay the pleasure while the old mattresses in your bedroom remind you of those tiring, long hours at work. By having sex in a more romantic and different environment, you rediscover yourselves once again and bring back the passion, intense desire for love and affection.

Adultery and Marriage

What’s the greatest mistake a person can do to his or her partner? Sleeping with another person is perhaps the highest form of betrayal that could happen to romantic partners, especially the married ones. But believing that the solution to all our hopes and dreams about sex, love and family is marriage is similar to believing that adultery is the best solution for all our marital conflicts. We can say that adultery springs from a poor marital relationship – a relationship that lacks trust, love and affection. A satisfied partner wouldn’t want nor dare to exchange his life and happiness for a few hours of pleasure with someone he has just met in the club.

Sex tells the truth

Sex produces involuntary reactions that suggest our real emotions. For instance, lubrication tells a person that he is physically attracted and emotionally connected with the one he or she is having a sexual affair with. Sex is the most intimate activity that two hearts can share. It creates a bond that has lasting effects, some of which are so elusive and difficult to define that only our subconscious mind could perceive.

Whether we talk about it with our friends, relatives or our very own intimate partners, issues on sex are sure to cause some controversy. Nevertheless, despite the ridiculous, nasty, vague things we hear about sex, it still remains the most artistic expression of genuine love.

Dear Readers,

As a therapist what are the best ways to tackle such matters which causes upset with so many people today?

Share your thoughts below.