Sources of Stress in Relationships and How to Overcome Them
Stress is part of any relationship. Couples go through different periods of change, hassles and emotional issues that often cause them great distress. However, there are sources of stress that can be addressed and prevented. Knowing all these things and how to overcome them can help couples protect and improve their relationship.
Most Common Causes of Stress in a Relationship
Lack of Freedom
Some people find themselves in a very controlling or manipulating relationship wherein they could not make decisions without the help of the other. Whilst being in a relationship means being emotionally connected and unified, freedom to be autonomous is important to a person’s wellbeing. Each partner should know his or her limitations. Whilst the emotional bond and commitment makes them one, respect for each other’s autonomy is necessary.
Communication Problems
Most problems start with small communication glitches that pile up over time. Couples who have insufficient communication skills increase their stress by being less able to create good solutions to the challenges they face. Scheduling time for conversations, with focus on the issues that they struggle with is the best way to fix whatever communication problems there are in a relationship.
Unmanaged Anger
Being overly-emotional often sparks bigger problems in a relationship. It is important for both people in a relationship to learn how to control their emotions. Calmness, respect, and compassion are critical aspects of any romantic relationship.
Feelings of Insecurity
Feeling insecure is unavoidable sometimes but this should not persist for long. When someone is overly insecure, he or she gets easily distracted by little issues within the relationship. Couples should learn how to make their partners feel more secure. Honest appreciation, sweet words, and compliments help eliminate the sense of insecurity that a person may feel.
Bad Behaviour and Domination
Bad behaviour makes a person feel physically, mentally and emotionally unsafe in a relationship. Sometimes, when one wants one thing and the other wants another, conflict arises. Insisting what they both want without providing an explanation can just worsen the situation. Couples should reach a compromise and deal with situation together to achieve a win-win solution.
Silence
Sometimes, the most practical solution to prevent an argument is to stay silent. But not speaking up regarding the concerns they have on each other can lead to great distress. When a partner is unaware of his or her shortcoming, he or she is likely to carry on with it. Talking about problems over a coffee will surely help.
You-Messages
Many times, incorrect choice of words can lead to big understandings. Starting a message with the word ‘you’ makes it sound so dominating or controlling. It also goes beyond the boundary of the other person’s autonomy. This can feel threatening to the other and could lead to more problems.
Too Much Focus on the Flaws
Giving so much attention to the things that make a relationship problematic can cause great stress to the couple. Instead of ruminating on each other’s shortcomings, a couple should give more importance to the good things about their relationship.
Power Imbalance
Both partners should have a voice and power to decide in the relationship. When the power comes from only one source, the other person may feel neglected or deserted. The couple should talk about their personal roles and responsibilities within a relationship, one of which is the obligation to remain fair to each other.
How do you cope with the stresses in your romantic relationship? We’d love to hear your story. Share your comment below.
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