Reasons Why You’re Not Getting What You Want

Sharon Moore November 21, 2014

We all have dreams and most of us work really hard to achieve them. Whether it’s a rewarding career, a healthier and slimmer body, a big house, or a happy family – there are a lot of things that we all want. The sad truth, however, is that not everyone get to achieve their dream. And it’s not that it wasn’t destined for them. Too often, it’s their negative beliefs that are actually preventing them from succeeding in life.

Here are some of the top reasons why you might be sabotaging yourself from getting what you really want:

You doubt yourself.

Self-doubt is the opposite of self-esteem. If you don’t think you deserve to be happy, to handle a higher position at work, or to have a good life and a family – then don’t think you will ever get those. Self-doubt affects everything you do. It makes you give up too easily, find excuses, and listen to critics. Before you take action in pursuing your goals. You first have to believe that you are capable of achieving them and that you deserve to get all those accomplishments.

You focus too much on what other people think.

If you put a lot of your energy trying to please other people, you end up doing less for yourself. When you’re making a decision, you can expect a lot of comments and suggestions. You might find some really encouraging while others, not. Maybe your colleagues think you are too foolish, or that your business idea won’t sell. Maybe your family isn’t in favour of you pursuing a different career path or marrying a person you just met. But does it really matter? After all, it’s your life, not theirs. When you become too busy living it for them, you are no longer living life for yourself.

You give up easily.

What you want means going through series of challenges, some are easy some are not. Best things take time and effort. Achieving a rewarding career, for instance, take years of dedication and continuous learning. You might think you know what makes a great relationship now, but wait until you experience all sorts of difficulties. “It may be near though it seems afar”, so goes a popular poem. When you give up too soon, you may end up spending the rest of your life in regrets.

You are afraid to fail.

Failure hurts. It really does. There’s no wonder why many people are afraid to fail. But ask the most successful people you know if they ever failed and they will proudly tell you they did. Failures serve an incredible avenue for learning. It makes us determine our strengths and work on things that need to be improved. Failure hurts, but it makes us stronger. Setbacks aren’t the problem. It’s how we perceive them to be that makes things complicated. When things don’t go as you planned, you could quit right then and there, or stand up and try again.

You expect too much from yourself.

You are not superman. You can’t do it all. You may already be getting what you want, the problem is that you’re not realising it. If you have too much on your to-do list, you miss the fun that the present moment brings. Take each challenge one at a time. Make baby steps. Have fun. Laugh. Be silly. Rest. If you keep running to get to somewhere, you miss the fun of getting there. So just slow down. You will get there, in the right time.

Remember the popular saying – “When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” So believe in yourself, focus on your goals, not on what people say, don’t be afraid to fail, make room for error, never give up, and set your expectations low. Getting what you want is extremely possible.