How Can You Turn Down Perfectionism?

Lisa Franchi January 07, 2014

Want to be happy? Here’s a simple tip for you – stop trying to be perfect. The truth is that nobody is perfect and no one can be perfect. If you choose to live your life in perfection, you are bound to meet disappointment and frustration along the way.

Perfection is more of an inhibitor than a motivator. People who make perfection the centre of their lives tend to have issues with time management, procrastination, excessive worry, work or school performance, and relationship. The ‘standards’ for these people are so high that success often becomes impossible. This leads to feelings of guilt, shape, dissatisfaction and ungratefulness. If you think you are a perfectionist, now is the time to slowly wean it from your life.

But turning down perfection is easier said than done. Many people deny the fact that they are in the quest for perfection, whilst some fail to recognise it. The good thing is – it is possible to turn down perfection. How? Try following the simple steps:

Focus on the journey, not just the destination. A lot of perfectionist individuals get caught up with the stress and anxiety that comes with their tasks. As a result, they forget what really matters more. Finding enjoyment whilst in the middle of a task motivates us to do better, thus, increasing our likelihood of success. On the other hand, when you are tensed, worried, and anxious or threatened, your vision narrows and you are more likely to get stuck.

Stop comparing. Perfectionism can be fuelled by latching on to someone you admire or despise. It may appear like one of your Facebook friends is living a ‘perfect’ life with their great photos at luxury destinations. Yes they may have charmed aspects of their lives. But even the most successful people have gone through a series of difficulties. If you are going to compare, compare to real human beings, not just the snapshots posted and status shared on Facebook. Better yet, don’t compare at all. Instead, connect. You can learn a lot from these people. They can motivate you more to succeed.

Look at the bigger picture. If you keep looking on that very small detail, you might miss the message the whole picture tells. If you are too focused with those little imperfections, you might fail to see the progress you’ve made, and the milestones you have achieved.

Be patient. Replace perfectionism with patience. Though we all want those instant, perfect moments, most things take time and effort. Some goals need ample amount of time before they are materialised. Remember, every big endeavour begins with that one, small step. So don’t rush. Enjoy the ride.

Be passionate. Be passionate rather than perfectionist. We are more likely to succeed when we are motivated by our passion, not by success itself. Furthermore, when you do things with passion, you don’t get tired easily, and challenges don’t prevent you from moving forward.

Learn to prioritise. Write down your goals. What are the things do you really want to accomplish? Which among your goals could really make a difference in your life? Which of them can make you happy? One of the pressures on a perfectionist is that every outfit, every word they say, and every step they make has a score card so they must do it right. Take time to assess everything and learn to figure out what is more important to you.