Helping Your Partner Overcome Mental Illness: 7 Key Steps

Lisa Franchi July 06, 2015

Mental illness can create a huge toll on one’s relationship. It can be tormenting too on the part of that person’s significant other. If your partner suffers from anxiety, depression or any other mental health problem, realise that there are many things you can do to help him/her and save your relationship.

Realise that it’s not their fault.

It is really hard to stay as understanding as possible when your partner is acting sad, anxious, irritable, or angry. But remember that they don’t like how they are feeling too. Mental illness is real and can manifest in varying symptoms, including changes in mood and perspective. Such symptoms are as real as those in physical diseases like diabetes or high blood pressure. In mental illness, negative thinking and behaviour are symptoms that are hard to control.

It is not about you.

Don’t think that the reason why your partner is acting like that is because he or she doesn’t want to be with you anymore. Mental illness is personal. However, you should set boundaries and let your partner know when they have crossed the line and hurt your feelings.

Communication is the key.

It may be difficult to let someone with mental illness open up, but it never hurts to try. Communication is vital to a relationship, especially when there’s a concern about mental health. During a depression, anxiety or bipolar episode, it can be hard to communicate and connect with each other, but it is only by properly expressing your emotions that you can find a bit of peace in such difficult times.

Do your homework. Learn about the illness.

It is hard to support someone with mental illness when you don’t have a single idea of what they are going through. Mental illnesses may differ in symptoms, nature and treatment options. Learning as much as you can about it highly important to supporting someone with mental illness.

Accept their limitation.

There will be times that you will find it hard to comprehend why they can’t do something they have been doing before, or act the way they used to or supposed to. Learn to accept their limitations. Again, it is not their fault.

Be more compassionate.

While it is important to remember that your partner is suffering from mental illness, it also important that you separate him or her from the illness. Remember that behind those unpleasant symptoms – emotional disconnection, anxiety, etc. – is the person you love.

Practise more self-love.

Supporting someone with mental illness can be emotionally and physically challenging too. By taking more care of yourself, you are preventing yourself from feeling burned out, stressed or overwhelmed. Practising self-love is essential to keep balance and effectively walk your partner through such a difficult moment.

Your partner can heal and fully recover from mental illness. But you have a big role to play. Anyway, that’s what couples should be – being around and helping each other through thick and thin.