Best Friends for Life: What Long-Term Friends Do Differently

Rebecca Lewis October 16, 2014

Tweet

Friends don’t just make us happy. They can also make us healthy. Studies suggest that establishing positive relationships is one key towards physical and mental health. In one Australian study, it was found that good friends are even more likely to increase longevity than close family members.

If you have a friend who has been with you all through these years, through thick and thin, call yourself ‘lucky’ and give yourself a pat on the shoulder. Not everyone is blessed with true friends. However, if you can’t figure out a person you consider your ‘best friend’, or you feel like there is no tight bond that exists between you and your mates, don’t be sad. There are certain things you can do to improve the quality of your friendships.

Below are 5 things BFFs do differently. Incorporating these traits in your social relationship may help you win more friends and strengthen your bond with your old buddies.

They make time for each other.

It’s not enough that you chat with each other on Facebook, ‘Like” each other’s post, or follow each one’s shout out on Twitter. You’ve got to have time for each other. There’s something more special with creating new memories together than simply communicating online. Give time for your friends. Do plan a get-together or a vacation somewhere.

They don’t expect too much.

Too much expectation can be detrimental to your friendship. When your expectations from your friends are not met, you are more likely to feel neglected and unloved. Furthermore, it can cause you huge disappointment. We can’t expect our friends to be there for us all the time. Remember that they, too, have their own sets of challenges and difficulties. Accept that they are humans and that they will make mistakes. Your best friend may be unable to be there with you at a specific time and place for a reason. By lowering your expectations, you are allowing your friendship to bloom and progress.

They welcome change.

People who have longstanding friendships welcome change in their life. They allow their friends to grow and change as they themselves change and grow. You may feel like your friend is much better before than now. But clinging into the past will only give you frustration. Accept the fact that people change. And instead of fretting about it, celebrate each other as you are now while you enjoy reminiscing the past together.

They value their friendship.

As mentioned, not everyone is blessed to have such a true and loving friend. Lifelong friendships are often hard to find, and are too precious to lose. So if you have that person in your life now, never take them for granted. BFFs value their relationship. And just as they give time and effort to others things that they consider important, they also value their friendships much.

They choose compassion instead of cynicism.

Friendship without compassion doesn’t stand long. Compassion is its own reward, as it leaves us feeling good within ourselves regardless of how a friend may be behaving. Lifelong friends are able to see past the surface. When things aren’t going well between them, they settle it through compassion, not cynicism.

Friends are the family we choose for ourselves. We value those that we have in our life right now. Nourishing friendships takes effort, love and understanding. By spending quality time with each other, not setting expectations, allowing each other to grow and welcoming change, valuing your friendship, and showing compassion, we can establish meaningful, lifelong friendships.