Are You a Compassionate Person? 6 Ways to Tell

Amy Taylor June 30, 2014

If you’ve been reading well about the latest on health and wellness, you know that money, fortune and fame are not really the key to happiness. Research on positive psychology suggests that if we want to be happy, we should practise compassion. That is, your happiness does not depend solely on you, but in your relationship with others too.

Being compassionate requires a good heart and an open mind. Here are ways to tell if you are a compassionate person.

You love yourself.

Loving yourself is never a selfish act. In fact, it is the first step towards loving others. The logic is simple: it’s hard to feel for other people something we don’t feel for ourselves. What love will you give if you don’t have it in the first place? This is supported by research too. In the study by University of California, Berkeley, people who practise self-compassion are more motivated to improve themselves and pursue their personal goals. Loving yourself is not costly. It simply requires being kind to your mental, physical and emotional self. Start by changing unhealthy habits to positive ones. And don’t forget to give time for relaxation. Do pamper yourself from time to time.

You don’t put much emphasis on money.

Money doesn’t buy happiness. Therefore, it also doesn’t buy compassion. If you spend all your life trying to fill your bank account, you might end up feeling lonely, empty and alone when you reach old age. Researchers from the University of California, Berkeley found that as someone grew in social class, his or her compassion for others declined. This doesn’t mean you should stop doing all means to earn and save money. Of course, you need it to sustain your living. But you have to remember that there are things that matter too (if not more). They include your family, friends, and things that money can’t buy.

You’ve got high EQ.

Being compassionate requires more EQ than IQ. When you are emotionally intelligent, you find it easier to deal with other people, empathise with them, and understand where they are coming from. You see the world in a more positive light. Life can be tough. Sometimes, difficult situations can overwhelm us and affect our capacity to think, reflect and consider. There are times when they can also fuel our hurt. Emotional intelligence can help us to begin to put compassion into practice in everyday life.

You are grateful.

A good way to harness compassion is to practise gratitude. Counting the ‘positives’ in your life can lead you to better behaviour with other people. Scientific research shows that as one feels gratitude, he or she becomes coherent, or aligned, and his or her body, heart, mind and spirit all are in a flow. The mere fact that you are still alive suggests many other things to be thankful of. These include having friends, a loving family, a job, food on the table, and so on.

You are self-aware.

Whenever you practise compassion, you are also practising mindfulness. Compassionate people rarely check their mobile phones when they are with other people. Being mindful is crucial to practising compassion because it allows you to fully focus of what you are doing. It makes you focus on others rather than your own reflections.

You give.

They say the more you give, the more you get. That’s very true when it comes to love and happiness. When you give out happiness and love, you will receive the same multiple times. You need not spend a fortune to reach out to others. When it comes to generosity, small things count. Whether it’s buying coffee for your friend, being a shoulder others can cry on, or helping a colleague or a family member with a chore – it’s sure to bring you sheer happiness.