7 Habits that Steal Your Happiness

Rebecca Lewis February 28, 2014

Some habits are helpful. But some are not only dangerous to your health but also to your well-being. Worse, we often don’t realise that such habits are causing us happiness. You probably know the daily habits that could shorten your life. Today, let’s talk about those that steal your happiness.

You’re always waiting for the ‘perfect’ moment.

A lot of people spend a lifetime waiting for that perfect moment. But the truth is that there’s no perfect moment. Moments aren’t perfect. They are what you make them. The outcome of your decisions and actions depend on the efforts you have exerted, the hard work you did, and the commitment and dedication you’ve shown.

You work only for the paycheck.

Being in the career you really don’t want is like being sentenced with a lifelong imprisonment. To succeed and be happy about your job, it must be something that fits your passion and interest. If you’re working only for the paycheck, you’re most likely to feel stressed, burned out, and unproductive. But if you work because you love what you do, you are more likely to succeed and advance in your career, feel less stressed despite the heavy workload, and become satisfied.

You’re always taking pictures.

YouTube reports that over a hundred hours of video are being uploaded on their site every minute, and that its users watch more than 6 billion hours of video each month. Take note, YouTube is just one of the hundreds of websites where you can download and watch videos. Furthermore, over 55 million Instagram photos are uploaded each day. Such images range from pictures of food, elegant dinners, shopping sprees, vacation trips, and of course – selfies! But what do they have to do with your happiness? In his book The Longevity Project, Howard S. Friedman, Ph.D., a Professor of Psychology who spent over 20 years in the science of long life, explained that taking pictures and videos steal us from being present in the moment and truly enjoying it. “Even if your experience of an event is not diminished by recording it, you still give up the potential thrill of new events while reviewing the old,” Dr Friedman wrote on Psychology Today.

You harbour feelings of hate.

Darkness can never drive out darkness. Only light can do that. Same thing applies with hate. You can’t drive out hate with hate, only love can do that. Anger and hate controls us and manipulates us to become the person we really don’t want to be. It prevents us from being reasonable and open-minded. You have probably been hurt by some people in the past. If you keep on hating them, it is you who will suffer more, not them. It may not be easy but it’s definitely worth it. So let go of the hate, forgive, and move on.

You want to make a big difference all at once.

Every one of us wants a better world, or a better place to live in. You might feel the urge to change the world and make a difference all at once. But that is nearly impossible and most of all, very stressful. If you’re looking to make a difference, start within yourself, and then continue with the people closest to you, like your children or siblings. Focus on one step at a time. Those little things we do sometimes have the biggest impact on the lives of others, the entire community, and the whole world.

You dwell on difficulties.

Making a big deal out of the stressors and insignificant nuisances you encounter in your daily life can affect your well-being, your work, and your relationship with others. A bad day is just a bad day. Don’t make the undesirable emotions worse by dwelling on the difficulties. Setbacks are opportunities for learning. If you look at them this way, you are less likely to be affected by the negative feelings they bring. Events may be terrible and unacceptable at times. But it’s how you perceive them that matters more.

You worry and worry, and worry.

It’s alright to worry and it’s natural. But worrying too much can interfere with your happiness, as well as your daily activities. Excessive worrying drives fear, and fear is a powerful element that hinders you from moving forward, trying and taking risks, which ultimately lead to unhappiness. Make a list of things that worry you a lot. Assess which ones are really worth the worrying. Let go of the small things. Don’t clamp shackles to your own ankles. If you’re having troubles managing your worries, see a therapist.