11 Things Wise People Do Differently

Lisa Franchi April 09, 2014

Wisdom is among those things that are very difficult to define. Many psychologists agree that it involves an integration of knowledge, experience, and deep understanding that incorporates tolerance for the uncertainties of life as well as its ups and downs. If you know a few wise people in your life, you may find that they have some things in common. You probably notice that these people tend to be older and excel in the field they pursue. But age and intelligence aren’t the only factors that define wisdom. There are some more.

Here are some things that wise people do differently, as well as some tips to become one.

They have lots of experience.

Older people tend to be wiser than the younger ones not because of their age, but because they tend to have more life experiences. Like the old saying goes – experience is the best teacher. Wisdom is often a product of lessons and insights that you only get from hands-on experience. For instance, failing makes you more resilient and more prepared to go through new challenges. In a study published in the journal Psychology and Ageing, researchers found that even though older people’s brains slow down, experience and knowledge more than make up for it - helping them make better financial decisions.

They think before they speak.

Wise people think first before they speak. They make sure that what comes from their mouth is something that they can be proud of, not something they will regret later. Wise people avoid nonsense arguments and only seek meaningful ones.

They are open to learning.

Experiences alone don’t make people wise. It’s learning from them. Same goes with mistakes. Mistakes are useless when you don’t get the lessons they are trying to impart. Wise people are like sponges. They keep absorbing the learning and insights from the experiences they encounter in life. They soak themselves in lessons wherever they are – whether it’s in the town they lived all their life, or some far-flung location.

They have survived something hard.

Many people who are considered wise are those who have survived a trauma or several adversities in life. These people are not afraid to fail and get hurt big time. But wisdom can also come from managing small problems. There are little crises that make you think deeply and test your power to make sound decisions.

They have a strong social network.

One of the conditions that tend to separate people who are able to grow and learn from a difficult situation from those who are not is the presence of a strong support system. Your friends and family serve as your backbone – helping you stand straight even during the most difficult times. When people know they are alone, learning from a mistake or trauma becomes difficult. Don’t be afraid to tap on your friends and family and those people who are willing to help you out. They just don’t make the burden you carry lighter, they also make you wiser.

They stay attuned to the present moment.

Meditation can guide you through wisdom. Meditation is a mental practise – a process of training the mind. It makes you more aware of every detail in your surroundings, especially those that you don’t notice usually.

They’re compassionate.

Another defining quality of wisdom is the ability to look beyond one’s personal desires. According to Dalai Lama, “True compassion is not just an emotional response, but a firm commitment founded on reason.” Compassion, like experience, is a key component of wisdom. Through it, people can learn emotional intelligence and resilience, empathy, kindness and social responsibility, harmonious and caring relationships, and a greater sense of well-being and purpose. And as psychologist Robert Sternberg puts it, people who have gotten where they are by not taking other people’s interests into account or even by actively thwarting the interests of others… would not be viewed as wise.”

They challenge the status quo.

Wise people dare to question the rules. Instead of accepting things as they have always been, wise people are always in the lookout for a better way. Yes, they are not afraid to take risks because they know there could be an opportunity waiting to be unlocked. Nonetheless, they don’t submerge both feet into the waters. They know when something is worth taking the risk for, and when it’s not.

They aim to understand, rather than judge.

Many people are in the habit of judging others based on their looks and actions. But wise people resist this urge. They don’t aim to judge others, rather understand them, particularly where they are coming from. They are like detectives whose goal is to explain other people’s behaviours.

They have undying passion.

Passion fuels one’s hunger for knowledge. It gives people the drive to go on despite all obstacles. It is the true force which pushes wise people to learn more, and the magical elements which make all their work a fun thing to do. To be clear about where you are headed, it is important that you identify what your true passion is. When everything you do is in line with your passion, you constantly strive for new insights and never get tired of it.

They are curious as a cat.

Wise people keep an open eye for everything. They have this “beginner’s mind” – a receptive state of mind that is filled with the wonder of new learning, and being challenged anew by it. They know that learning doesn’t end after graduation. It is a never-ending process that gets more complicated as time goes by.