10 Things You Wouldn’t Say to People with Mental Illness
When it comes to mental illness, people often say the darnedest things. Even those in the medical field, like doctors and nurses, also make insensitive remarks sometimes, which leave people with mental illness hopeless and more ashamed of their condition.
Here are 10 things we should avoid saying to people who are struggling with mental health illness:
“Do you want to get better?”
This is perhaps the most hurtful thing we could say to people with mental illness. Of course they want to get better. No one would want to feel worse forever. Asking this question makes mentally ill people feel hopeless and unable to do anything about their condition.
“Just distract yourself.”
Distraction helps, but only a little. At the end of the day, a mentally ill person is still faced with the same issues. Ignoring these issues won’t make them feel okay. Rather, it can lead to more serious problems in the long run.
“Stop focusing on the bad side.”
What makes this statement problematic? Basically, it makes people with mental illness feel even worse about themselves. And the more they try harder to see the positive light but fail to do so, the more they will feel hopeless.
“It’s all in your head.”
Mental illness is a real condition. And it comes with varying symptoms – physical, emotional and psychological. When not treated properly, mental illness can greatly impact the person’s health and well-being, and quality of life.
"You’re just overreacting again.”
Sometimes, yes. But overreacting is one symptom of a type of mental illness called bipolar disorder. Hearing a bad comment (even if not addressed to them), or even watching a sad movie, can make a person with bipolar disorder overreact.
"Everybody has mood swings sometimes."
That’s true. But the mood problems being experienced by people with mental illness are different, and are more severe. This is especially true with people suffering from bipolar disorder. Even simple things can trigger their emotions and make them feel uneasy, sad, desperate and all.
“Why can’t you work?”
Mental illness can affect many aspects of a person’s life, including his or her work. It hinders concentration and makes a person less productive. Telling them that they are lazy, just making excuses, or aren’t trying hard enough can be incredibly hurtful.
“Change your attitude.”
Changing one’s attitude is not that easy, and it applies to everyone – with or without mental illness. Even highly functioning people find it hard to change their attitude.
“You have the same illness as my ______.”
Even people struggling with the same mental health problem experience varying severity in symptoms. Furthermore, not all treatments or coping mechanisms will have similar effects to them. It is easy to give advice and tell the person what to do basing on what you have witnessed with a friend or relative in the past. But he or she many need a different approach and the only way to learn about it is to ask a mental health professional.
“Suicide is selfish”
Feelings of suicide, worthlessness, sadness, and depression are not something mentally ill people choose. These are tricks that play in the mind, and it is really hard to cope with them. People with mental illness who are struggling with suicidal thoughts need support from friends, family and their therapist. They need to know that they are not alone in this battle.
When it comes to mental illness, a lot of people often make insensitive and totally outrageous comments which further aggravate the patient’s condition. There is no golden rule on what and what not to say. But there are a few things that could guide us. These include empathy, compassion and awareness.
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